Ehhhh!

Yes, Life’s like that.

Time check: Dropped on the road to pick up my car from The City Bar

Time check: Came back to odd non-Sanskrit chants from the crowded by-lanes

Time check: Cried my heart out to Extreme Make-overs Home edition (Yes … cry. There were children and dogs. All you machismo totting ‘nay-Sayers’, real men cry and wear pink)

Time check: Sauntered down the street hunting for food to eat (literally)

Time check: Got ogled at by 15 something girls (yes .. I’m 30, I don’t have a paunch and my t-shirt has form .. So?)

Time check: Got ogled at by 20 something boys (Yes .. I have large arms, no they are not implants and yes it’s shaved)

Time check: Found out that dosas are not lunch

Time check: Thought about posting the blog I wrote, but realized no one was going to understand and pretend to like it anyway. Openly and secretly there would be talk about how I write something a particular way to overcomplicate things (‘Dimwits! That’s how I write!’)

Time check: Bought a couple of ice-creams

Time check: Continued crying to Extreme Make-overs on BBC

Time check: Wondered why advertising agencies think that the only thing that can sell their products is sex (and Indian television spots look dangerously close to American ones)

Time check: Answered some angry ex-girlfriend messages, did not respond to several others

Time check: Wrote something

Time check: Realized how happy I am just being. Just … being.

And how I need nothing.

Yes, Life IS like that

Write! I comply.

The greatest dilemma that man has ever been faced with, other than the illimitable queries about bowel movements and its apparent effects on sleep and smoking patterns, has been the quest to quantify variables. Man hates variables. If man ever wanted a book written titled Life 101, the first thing he would ask for are all the variables he would face in Life 1 0 1 (Binary now).  Flerovium (atomic symbol Fl) and livermorium (atomic symbol Lv) just got added to the Periodic Table, the understanding of all variables is impossible. 

However, there are variances that Man accounts for, stemming from his limited understanding of his surroundings. He accounts for the love that another man shares for blaring monotones of monstrosity belted out from the vocal chords of Katy Perry while his more restrained taste in psychedelic rock is understated. Man accounts for vulgar hip gyrations that are offered for the front seats while his taste in carnal yet fluid jazz is locked away. Man accounts for death and life, light and darkness, sorrow and joy and every other spectrum encompassing variable. The one thing he forgets to account for hence, is the largest variance of them all, the one variable he can actually control – himself!

He continues to wonder how to account for that. My new variable – Wheels on hotel beds!